-le sigh-

i've been postponing a post because everytime i try to think about what to post, it ends up whiny. i do not want this blog to be me whining about everything, because there are people who are homeless, who don't have clean water, who aren't educated. so, i feel pretty bad talking about how awful kidney stones are or how much my father is ticking me off.

but you know what? i really miss my best friend. i had three seperate dreams about her last night, and they all made me really happy. i love having dreams that make me want to go back and just live in that dream instead of having to wake up.

however, today i have been very sad and mopey, because i miss her so much. you see, she is from china and has gone back to study this summer. our only correspondance now is through daily emails. as i wrote a response to her today, i struggled to put my feelings into words. i started to type "i had a dream last night you came home early, it made me smile when i woke up" but erased it before pressing send. i am not sure she considers here home yet.

these emails make me sad, but exhilirate me at the same time. it is great to hear from her, but there are things i really miss. like the noise that she made when she got really, really ticked that reminded me of a cat? it's going to be a really long 7 weeks until i see her.

omg it's been awhile.

SOOO, yeah. it's been like two months since i've posted. whoops. and it's not even like i was that busy, and have a reason. but now i'm basically stuck in bed for the next three weeks from kidney stones, i bet i'll update more.

summer has been pretty boring. i don't have a job, but i was planning on volunteering at the hospital, but that will probably have to wait until august. i was really looking forward to going to vermont for fourth of july... it was gonna be awesome. we were gonna hit the fireworks in ran.dolph on 3july, and then air.plane flats in 4july. and go tubing down the river and have a cookout and i was gonna help build a float for the parade. also, i was looking forward to some of the free cheese they throw at the parade. wahhh. :(.

one of the reasons i was always to lazy to blog is because i wonder if i have anything of value to say. do my fourth of july plans bore people? more than likely. whenever i try to write something that remotely has any substance to it, it just comes out feeling fake... so would i rather be boring, or fake? that is the big question.

also, a very potter musical on youtube is just about the funniest thing i've ever seen. go to www.youtube.com/starkidpotter to watch. it made my life.